I want to thank again all those who joined me yesterday for the marathon, it was great to have that support. I'm definitely feeling the effects this morning, but I'm looking forward to next year. I think I'm going to do a conventional race and try the training approach before hand.
I've had a lot of people ask me why I chose to do a race that far and I've been thinking about that since yesterday, and I have my answer. I do it because running has been such a help in my life over the past five or six years. For those of you who know me really well, you know the person I was back then, and the person I am now. I hope you have been able to see the difference between them.
Back then I hated any form of pain, mental or physical, it didn't matter, I hated it all and would do anything to avoid it. I used alternate ways of dealing with pain that only masked it temporarily. It got to the point that to even be around my family required me to mask that pain in order to be able to function and interact with them.
I met a Bishop that invited me to run with him. Every other morning at 5:30 he would pick me up and we would run. I was ashamed to be around people back then and he taught me that because of what the Savior had done for me I didn't need to beat myself up anymore. On these runs, I worked through my own personal repentance process and faced the one thing that had been my downfall, pain. I learned that I didn't need to run from pain but needed to embrace it and accept that it can and does make you stronger.
I learned that pain is only temporary, even if it lasts for the duration of this life, and that it meant I was truly alive. Masking it meant I wasn't living to my full potential. While I still don't like pain, and thought about quitting many times yesterday, I didn't, and that's something that those who know me from before can say wouldn't have happened back then. I would have quit at the first sign of pain, I probably wouldn't have even started in the first place.
So that's why I do what I do, to prove to myself that I am still a better person than I was before.
That's why I run.
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wow... thanks for sharing that. i feel like i get it now. you make running that far sound like a virtue. nope... nope... not that good yet. but i fully support you doing it -- and i really appreciate you sharing that part of yourself.
ReplyDeletei just can't imagine you any way other then how you are now. hm... the atonement is very powerful in all of our lives!
do you have any tattoos or anything that can give me a better picture?
either way, you barney's are awesome, and we love you both. congrats on such a big accomplishment!
What a powerful way to make weak things become strong!
ReplyDeletehey there, I linked from melissa's blog. This is very well said. I just ran the St. George Marathon too. My first one. I trained really hard, but was still slow, but hey we finished right? What a wonderful gift to finish, so many didn't, or couldn't. I am impressed that you could blog enroute. Congrats on finishing, woo hoo!!!!
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